Random Quote: Hurricane Chris…

I’m rarely at a loss for words… but Tropical Storm Terrence… I mean Hurricane Chris has brought me to that point. He was recently interviewed (for some odd reason) by SoJones.com and he talked about his upcoming album Unleashed, which he says is made up of mostly freestyles (yesss!), his sequel to the song “Halle Berry” that will be named after a popular R&B chick (more fire!) and then he went and said this….

“I’m the best rapper alive, put a mic in front of me and you gon’ see what’s up! You know they duckin’ me they dodging me; I’m that new kid on the block they’re scared of, that they know is gettin’ all the girls! But they be like ‘oh him?’ (laughs). But you know it’s hurting your feelings every time I get on the freestyle and wreck it till they can’t even listen to an instrumental no more. We got a lot of cats who say they freestyling, and you turn on the radio and you hear the same thing that they said they was freestyling a minute ago, you hear that wrote down, you know? A lot of these clowns is just what I said: clowns.”

*sigh* Look, I don’t care if you’re sober, drunk, high or being waterboarded there’s no excuse for this type of rhetoric. There’s so many reasons why his comments border on the edge on delusional and good ol’ fashion insanity, but here’s four right off the top…

1.) Prior to even hearing him rap one word, his rap name alone disqualifies him from even being mentioned in the same breath as “the best rapper alive”.

2.) His only 2 “hit” singles are “A Bay, Bay” and “Halle Berry (She’s Fine)“. I really shouldn’t have to go into any details regarding either song and how they don’t even put him in the same stratosphere as someone who should be considered “the best rapper alive”.

3.) Look at the picture of Hurricane Chris above……he looks like he could be Da Brat’s fraternal twin sister. I’m sorry, but if you’re a man and you look like a woman, who looks like she’s trying to look like a man….I just can’t take you serious.

Bonus:
Da Brat – B-Side Ft. Notorious B.I.G.
I think a lot of people forgot about this song.

4.) Back in June he was invited to rap his song “Halle Berry (She’s Fine)” for the Louisiana House of Representatives (why I don’t know). The best rapper alive, let alone any person with an ounce of common sense, would’ve graciously declined that offer due to fact that they would look like a complete ass. But nope, not Tsunami Samuel….unfortunately he proudly rose to the occasion…

…to make matters even worse, when asked how such an opportunity came along, his response was:

“Well you know that’s the spot where they do a lot of deciding for laws and regulations that’s gonna affect my people and my community. I don’t see nobody from the heart of my community that get to sit down and voice their opinions on how they feel it should be ran. So I had to give it to em’ from my point of view. A lot of dudes and a lot of women be making laws that ain’t right… so I’m comin’ in sayin’ ‘nah, we may need to do this a different way!’…I’m coming from the younger generation so I kinda know how to deal with my people.”

Oooohhhhh! So the song “Halle Berry” really has a deep political meaning and it was made to promote change throughout the impoverished communities of New Orleans. Okay…..now I like that song.

For more completely ridiculous quotes and to read more of Chris’ hilarious interview head over to SoJones.com.

Random Quote: Sean Price…

Sean Price is one of the realest rappers out, there’s no denying it…he’s the epitome of grimey, gully, hood, etc. XXL recently interviewed him about his upcoming mixtape Kimbo Price and album Mic Tyson, his unwillingness to get involved with rap politics and a possible reunion with some old rap friends. They also asked him about life after rap and of course his answer was nothing less than real.

XXL: Since you’re growing tired of the politics of the rap game what’s on the horizon for you after these releases?

Next year you might find me workin’ in Costco or some shit. I’m dead ass serious, ’cause I don’t got money like that to retire and fall back on a yacht. People might say, “Yo, man, you supposed to be here and blah blah.” Yeah, I’m supposed to be but guess where I’m at? Costco. Now don’t get it twisted, I’m not starvin’ and I’m good, but I don’t give a fuck about pride. My kids can’t eat pride so as long as I take care of my family I don’t give a fuck.

*Applauds* That’s the type of attitude you’re suppose to have when you have mouths to feed. There are a lot of “men” out here that have a warped sense of entitlement and feel like they’re too good to do certain things. Hate to break it to you bum ass fuckas ….NOBODY OWES YOU SHIT. If you have kids, turn off the video games, get off your ass and go flip burgers if you have to. Whatever it takes to provide for the human beings you helped bring into this world….you need to do it. I don’t even have kids and I’ve worked some pretty shitty jobs, mainly while I was in college. All because I wanted to get a piece of toilet paper college degree. So if you have kids to take care of there’s really no excuse. Movin on…

There’s not a lot of upcoming mixtapes/albums that I’m excited about, but I’m anxiously awaiting Kimbo Price and Mic Tyson. To read the rest of the interview and to see what Sean P has to say about a possible Fab 5 reunion head over to XXL.

BtwI just felt like posting this video. Talk about a posse cut…this shit was crazy.

Bonus:
Fab 5 (Heltah Skeltah & O.G.C.) – Leflaur Leflaur Eshkoshka

Random Quote: Lloyd…

Gonzo, I mean Lloyd was recently interviewed by Hip Hop Weekly and when he was asked about his relationship with Ciara, whom he’s been friends with for several years (prior to either becoming famous), he said…

“I don’t fuck with Hollywood bitches and she’s like one of the chicks that’s just changed along the way with the fame and the money and all of that. I don’t really get down with her anymore on some real shit. The truth hurts, but it will set you free. But I wish her all the best.”

Ummm well then…I guess that’s that. Well in C-error’s defense her last album, Fantasy Ride, was a complete fail, her videos were wack and she completely disrepected comic books with that wacktacular ass album cover. Okay, so that wasn’t really in her defense. But unless she’s grinding, gyrating or slow winding in a video, I could care less about C-error or what Lloyd thinks about her. I just posted this to show you that Lloyd is a long lost descendant of the Cleveland Indians.

Random Quote: Nia Long…

Damn…Nia muhf%@kin Long! I swear this is my OBM…original baby momma. Her fine ass was recently interviewed by UK based, Pride magazine and was asked what she thought about Beyonce Knowles’ performance in Obsessed. Her response…

“I didn’t see Obsessed, so I can’t comment, but it’s just not about how talented you are anymore. It’s about, ‘How much box-office revenue will this person generate?’ When you see certain people – we won’t name names – they just don’t have the skill, and no one in their team has said, ‘You need acting classes,’.

If you’re a singer not an actress, you should sing. If you’re a rapper, you should rap…if you take time to develop your craft, God bless you. Jamie Foxx is an example of both [actor and singer].”

I knew there was a somethin’ about her (besides the fact that she’s fine) that I loved. No need for me to beat a dead horse…I’ve already said it here, here and here that Beyonce can’t act for shit. Everybody gives her a pass because either they’re a stan or they’re in the industry and don’t want to rub the Knowles Mafia the wrong way.

I already know the Beyonce stans are going to say that Nia’s bitter or “hatin'” because she hasn’t been in any films lately. I really don’t think that’s the case….I think she just answered the question honestly. Beyonce is a talented singer, but if you stans would look past the lace front wigs for one second you’d see that she’s a terrible actress.

Bonus:
Toni Tony Tone – Just Me & You
Wtf does this song have to do with Nia Long? Remember they played this in the background in Boyz N’ Tha Hood when Trey was tryin’ to talk Brandy into givin’ him some ass?

…his reasoning skills were fuckin’ terrible.

Trey on the debate team = FAIL

Random Quote: Eve…

Last week Eve decided to beat a dead horse and comment on the whole Chris Brown and Rihanna situation via Twitter.

Her comments were in response to Chris’ recent video in which he talks about his new album and states “I’m not a monster”.

“hold on hold on!! im just gonna reach out to some of ya’ll out there and say this bluntly, why do ppl keep tryin to protect chris browns ass

hes guilty until proven innocent, and no man should ever raise a hand to a woman, im so sick of people kissin his ass..yeh i did just watch

a clip of him saying he isnt a monster…yeh motherfucker u are. let him or any other man come to me with power fists..id fuck him up.

and a message to rihanna…girl your beautiful and talented and u dont need a nigga like that around u…ur special and deserve better…

& finally,no we dont no wat happened that night, all i no, is seein rihannas beautiful face bruised and upset..thats enuff 4 me.“

I’ve been trying to avoid putting my 2 cents in on the whole Chrianna saga. But after reading this I figured I’d comment on a few things about this and domestic violence in general…

• I don’t think that a man should put his hands on a woman…that should go without saying. I think any man who hits or beats his woman/girlfriend/wife is a certified bitch and I have more respect for the Charmin’s diamond weave 2-ply toilet paper that I wipe my ass with than I will ever have for any man that does so.

  As with every rule, there is an exception. With that being said, a man has just as much of a right to defend his life as a woman does. If a woman comes at me with a knife, bat, lead pipe, gun or any other weapon with intent to harm or kill me, she’s just given me the green light to fuck her up to whatever point is necessary to ensure my safety and well-being. In that situation, I’m going into survival mode and the gender of my offender is the least of my concerns.

• Chris Brown was dead wrong for putting his hands on Rihanna. I saw the pics just like everyone else, and while I don’t know exactly what happened, I don’t think his life was in danger or it was a situation that warranted his actions.

  Eve says that Chris Brown is a monster and he’s guilty until proven innocent. I honestly don’t think Chris Brown is a monster…John Wayne Gacy is a monster. Ted Bundy is a monster. Jeffrey Dahmer is a monster. If this is truly the first time Chris has done something like this…he is young man who obviously made a very bad decision. He fucked up. No if, ands or buts about it. He was wrong and he should suffer the consequences of his actions. If Rihanna was a close friend or family member of mine, those consequences would involve the wiring of Mr. Brown’s jaw. As well as months of rehabilitation…ever seen somebody pop-lock in a wheelchair?

• From a very young age, any male that was raised correctly has been told that he should never put his hands on a woman. While there’s nothing wrong with this statement (sans the exception rule), I feel as though it’s one sided and somewhat incomplete. By instilling this notion into the minds of both, boys and girls, we’re indirectly saying that it’s okay for a woman to put her hands on a man. This notion hurts women more than men because it gives some women a false sense of security, a propensity to physically disrespect men and to a degree it sets them up to become victims of domestic violence later on in life. I think that as much as the notion that a man should never put his hands on a woman is stressed, the notion that a woman should never put her hands on a man should be stressed equally if not more. How many times have you seen or heard of a woman hitting a man? Of those times how many times did the man do nothing in response? *cough*Charles Hamilton*cough* I believe that some women may hit or attack men with the preconceived notion that he will respond in the “correct” manner and do nothing.

  For example, I was raised from a very young age to never put my hands on a woman and to treat women with utmost respect. In my 27 years on this earth, I’ve only had one physical altercation with the opposite sex….and that was in the 2nd grade. Remember when kids used to write “Do you like me?” on a piece of paper and put “Yes” of “No” on it for you to circle? Do kids still do that? With all of technological advancements that have taken place since the 80’s they probably don’t, shit they’ll be sending holograms in minute….damn I feel old. Anyway, one day this girl in my class sent me one of those notes and despite the fact that I didn’t really like her, I circled “Yes”. Back then in grammar school that was like saying “I do.” So we started our life together, you know…..sitting with each other at lunch, sharing butter cookies, holding hands, pushing her on the swings at recess…real love. So this lasted about 2 weeks before I decided I wanted to go back to living the life of a 7 year old bachelor. I figured I’d end it the same way it began, so I sent her a note. I don’t recall what it said exactly, but it was probably somewhere along the lines of “I don’t like you no mo…”

  As I watched the note make its way over to her, I thought to myself, “she really likes me….this is gonna break her heart….and piss her off.” I wanted to do neither, so at one point I started to recall the note, but it was too late. The note was well on its way to her desk, being passed from one snot nosed hand to the next. Then I thought about it like, “Forget her, I’ve been missing out on quality conversations at recess with the fellas. We had catching up to do….the new season of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was amazing, G.I. Joe had some new action figures that had just been released….I’m about to live it up!”

  Then I saw her face as she read the note….two words came to mind….”Uh, Oh.”

  Needless to say, she wasn’t too happy about the divorce papers she had just received. The whole day I remember feeling extremely uncomfortable. This probably had something to do with the fact that she was staring at me like I had just stole her chocolate milk at lunch and tore the heads off of all her Barbie dolls. I mean if looks could kill…I wouldn’t be writing this because I would’ve died when I was 7 yrs old. When school was over I felt so relieved that I had made it through the day without any problems. I figured she’d be over it by tomorrow. Then I saw her…she came rushing towards me, her face red, her eyes filled with tears…and it was at that moment that I felt like shit. I mean, I was about to apologize then…

  …with strength of a ghetto Greek Goddess, she swung her right leg back and kicked me square in the nuts.

  The pain….oh…my…God….the pain. Instantly, I fell to the to my knees and she began to stomp me like it was a gang initiation. Now at this point there were a few things going on. I was crying immensely from the excruciating pain I was feeling in my nuts. I was also wondering if I would be able to reproduce when I got older. Lastly, I was contemplating foot sweepin’ that little bitch and beating her ass. Then I remember thinking that this was a girl, an innocent, delicate, pink blouse wearing girl….and my parents raised me to never put my hands on a female. Plus, outside of the kick to nuts, she really wasn’t hurting me….so I laid there blocking her British Knight sneakers for about 2 minutes or so until she ran off.

  Now suppose this little girl went on to kick a few more boys in the nuts while she was growing up. Then suppose that all of them responded to the situation the same way that I did. Subsequently, this little girl grows up to be a woman who has gone through life hitting men, who for whatever reason never hit her back. In addition to that, she was always raised to believe that a man should never put his hands on a woman. Now we have a woman who thinks it’s okay to hit a man because men don’t hit women back or at least they’re not suppose to. Despite hearing about and/or probably seeing men hit women, she thinks that those situations are rare exceptions and don’t apply to her because her experiences reinforce that train of thought. One day this grown woman gets into an argument with her boyfriend and things get heated. She punches him in the face. Now her boyfriend was raised to not put his hands on a woman…but he was also raised to believe if someone hits you, you hit them back. He also grew up thinking that the latter notion was more prevalent….so he punches her in the face.

  She was wrong. He was wrong.

  But the first thing that most people would say is that…

  “He should’ve walked away.”

  That would definitely be my response….but why is it that the burden of self-control is immediately placed on him? Is he more in the wrong than she is? Why wouldn’t the first thing out of people’s mouths be…

  “She shouldn’t have hit him.”

  In the end, I’m simply saying that both men and women should have the same amount of respect for each other. As with every action in life there are consequences, boys and girls need to be raised to know that they shouldn’t put their hands on anyone, regardless of their gender. We as a society need to place an emphasis on the fact that violent acts towards anyone male or female, boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife is not right.

Just in case you didn’t pick up on it…I believe that a man should have enough self-control to walk away, even if he’s punched by a woman, but that’s just how I was raised.

Even though I clown him…shout out to Charles Hamilton for taking that mouth shot like a man.

Random Quote: Hulk Hogan…

Hulk Hogan recently talked to Rolling Stone about his divorce to Linda Bollea, whom he has been married to for 24 years. He also discussed his feelings regarding her relationship with her boyfriend, Charlie Hill, and how he can relate to America’s favorite Bronco drivin’, isotona wearing, knife wielding, NFL hall-of-famer…

“I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like OJ, cutting everybody’s throat.”

“You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can’t go to anymore, you’re driving through downtown Clearwater [Florida] and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife….I totally understand OJ. I get it.”

A Few Things…

1.) He better pray to whoever he believes in, that Linda and her boyfriend never go missing and/or are found brutally murdered. Can you say prime suspect? The only thing the prosecutor will have to do is bring this interview up and he’ll be putting on exhibition matches in the confines of prison….red underwear and all.

2.) Do you know how he found out that his wife was divorcing him? No, it wasn’t thru a phone call or text, that would’ve been great. A newspaper reporter asked him about the divorce. He didn’t know what the reporter was talking about, so the reporter informed him that his wife had filed for a divorce. His response:

“Holy smokes….wow, you just knocked the bottom out of me.”

How shitty is that? Everybody knew his wife was divorcing him before he did. That’s the kind of information you should know before anybody else, let alone the general public. That’s like somebody walking up to you and being like…

“Hey man, how are you handling that Chlamydia?”

…and you have no idea what they’re talking about…that is until you go get tested.

3.) He’s a very strong guy emotionally, considering the fact that he hasn’t touched Linda and Charlie. I mean that’s pretty fucked up…his wife left him for one of his daughter’s former high school classmates. No seriously, the guy went to school with his daughter. Think about it, 15 years ago this kid was probably walking around wearing Hulkamania Fruit of Looms and calling everybody “Brother”. Now he’s driving Mr. Hogan’s Escalade around town and giving his wife back shots in his 20,000 sq. ft. mansion.

4.) Fuck O.J. Simpson.

I was in high school when the whole O.J. murder trial was going on. I remember when he got aquitted…Black people everywhere where jumping around like slavery had just been abolished.

For what? It wasn’t a victory for anybody. Especially not Black people. O.J. didn’t give a shit about you then and he doesn’t give a shit about you now. I’m not 100% sure if he did it….I’m only about 99.9% sure, but he got off anyway because he was rich and able to acquire the representation of the brilliant Johnny Cochran (R.I.P.) and his defense team.

And what did O.J. “If I Did It, Here’s How It Happened book writing ass” Simpson do years down the line?

Get locked up.

Karma…course correction…

Random Quote: Bryan ‘Baby’ Williams…

Baby recently talked to VIBE about Lil’ Wayne’s upcoming album Rebirth and Wayne’s status in music…

“He can rap, he can sing, he’s just an artist…I don’t think no one will ever be greater [than Wayne] because we’re lovers I don’t think no one puts in the time or the quality. If someone do come along, can you imagine what he’ll have to do? He got to put out on thousand mixtapes, do a thousand records [and] sell 100 million records. 2Pac, Jay-Z and Biggie didn’t get to the shit Wayne’s done.”

You know I have a few things to say about this.

1.) First things first…2Pac and Biggie didn’t get to do a lot of shit, including “the shit Wayne’s done,” because they were murdered while they were still in their prime.

2.) 100 million records?! I hope he was joking. Just so you know Michael Jackson’s Thriller is the only album that’s sold over a 100 million albums worldwide. Yep, that’s just Thriller alone…that number doesn’t include any of his other albums. The album behind that, Back In Black by AC/DC, doesn’t even come close with 45 million albums sold worldwide.

3.) So what’s the highest selling rap/hip-hop album ever? Technically it’s the Love Below/Speakerboxx which sold an estimated 11 million albums. I personally don’t count that because it was a double CD and 1 sale counts as 2. So what’s the highest selling rap album behind it…Ready To Die with 10 million albums sold. Btw here’s a little food for thought, Biggie only recorded 2 albums before being murdered and is considered one of the greatest and most influential rap artist of all time. If Wayne was murdered after Lights Out was released where would he rank in rap history? Exactly…he wouldn’t.

UPDATE: I stand corrected on the highest selling rap/hip-hop album ever…check the comments.

4.) Pay homage and thank Jay-Z. Wayne said that Jay was a major influence on him and part of the reason he changed his style. If it wasn’t for Jay’s influence, Wayne would still be saying “wobblely” every 5 seconds, which would make him about as relevant as the rest of the Hot Boys right now. If that was the case you’d be at home right now broke as hell, playing co-op games with on Xbox Live.

5.) You’re a grown ass man who calls himself “Baby,” your opinion on any and everything is irrelevant.

6.) You call Wayne your “son”….he’s 27yrs old and your 40yrs old. You both admittedly kiss each other on the mouth. I think your opinion is biased.

Go to VIBE to read the entire interview.

UPDATE: In response to the comment “I smell hate in the air”…

Free speaking to Baby: “So when you kiss a girl…”

Interrupted by Lil’ Wayne: “Hey, I’m the only one he kiss.”

Baby: “That’s how I roll.”

Hey Anonymous, I don’t make this shit up….Game. Blouses. [(c)Dave Chappelle as Prince]

Random Quote: Jay-Z…

Best Life Magazine recently did a pretty lengthy article/interview with Mr. Carter. The article covered a lot of ground and while there weren’t any groundbreaking revelations, it’s still a good read. The article concludes with Jay’s 6 principles for living the best life…

(click pic to enlarge)

Go to Best Life online to read the entire article.

Random Quote: Lil’ Kim…

Lil’ Kim was recently interviewed by Rap Radar and she talked about her continual effort to make herself look like a fresh piece of shit.

When asked, “If Biggie were alive, do you think he would’ve been pleased with the film (referring to Notorious)? “

Check out her “I see dead people” response after the jump…

“I’m a very spiritual person and he’s come to me many of times in my dreams. But, I don’t think he’s happy at all, at all! Because Ms. Wallace doesn’t know Biggie at all and she barley knows Christopher, if you know what I mean. At all! And I was around. Even before he blew up so crazy, so I know how he felt about his mom. And Biggie was so much more than what they put him out to be in that movie. And to be honest with you, I know for a fact he’s not happy. He’s not satisfied at all. At all. And regardless of the fact, everybody who is involved in this movie, he has love for. Everybody. But at the end of the day, he knows who’s who and what’s what. Believe that. And let me tell you something, the way he’s feeling is going to come out. Like, trust me. Everything is going to come out later. You’re going to see who he really loved and the ones that’s standing up for him the right way is the ones representing him the right way.”

He comes to her in her dreams and tells her all of this? Really?…she can’t be serious. Hey Kim you wanna know why he comes to you in your dreams?….It’s because it’s a Fuckin’ DREAM!

In your dreams…Rick James could bust thru your front door, butt ass naked on a unicorn singing “Give It To Me Baby”. FYI, that doesn’t mean Rick is “coming to you” or sending you a hidden message about his disapproval of his VH1 Behind The Music special.

At this point, I don’t even think Lil’ Kim is still alive. I think she died during her 22nd plastic surgery procedure and a little Asian lady is walkin’ around pretending to be Lil’ Kim.

For the entire interview go to RapRadar.com.

Random Quote: Drake

Drake was recently interviewed by Complex and he shed light on quite a few topics including his upcoming album, ghostwriting for Lil’ Wayne, his family’s musical background, how he got started rapping and why his chooses to disclose the fact his Phantom is leased.

Here he explains the meaning behind the title of his most recent mixtape, So Far Gone.

“The whole tape extends from one of my closest friends Oliver—One night we were having a discussion about women and they way we were talking about them, it was so brazen and so disrespectful. He texted me right after we got off the phone and he was like, “Are we becoming the men that our mothers divorced?” That’s really where the cover comes from, too. It’ just this kid in pursuit of love and money. We’re good guys, I’m friends with some real good people and for him to even text me after we got off the phone it just showed we have a conscience. But sometimes you just get so far gone, you get wrapped up in this shit.”

To read the entire interview go to Complex.

Also, go here to get the chopped n’ screwed version of So Far Gone.